1 00:00:47,800 --> 00:00:48,760 Mom! 2 00:00:50,400 --> 00:00:52,160 Mom! Help me. 3 00:00:55,200 --> 00:00:56,160 What is it? 4 00:00:56,240 --> 00:00:58,960 l wasn't dreaming, Walt. l didn't imagine it. 5 00:00:59,040 --> 00:01:02,080 l heard him. l heard him. l heard him. l heard Chris. 6 00:01:02,320 --> 00:01:04,840 -l heard him! -l know. 7 00:01:05,040 --> 00:01:07,440 No. l wasn't imagining it, Walt. 8 00:01:07,841 --> 00:01:10,281 No, l did. He's... He's... 9 00:01:11,440 --> 00:01:13,560 -l heard him! -Billie. 10 00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:36,440 That's about as far as l can get you. 11 00:03:36,520 --> 00:03:38,080 All right. Thank you. 12 00:03:51,440 --> 00:03:54,640 -You left all your shit on my dash. -Keep it. 13 00:03:55,600 --> 00:03:57,040 Suit yourself. 14 00:03:57,600 --> 00:03:59,000 Thanks again. 15 00:04:00,880 --> 00:04:02,680 Hey, hold on a minute. 16 00:04:06,760 --> 00:04:09,560 Here, take these. They'll keep your feet dry. 17 00:04:10,920 --> 00:04:14,640 lf you make it out alive, give me a call. My number's inside the boots. 18 00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:16,080 Thanks. 19 00:08:42,520 --> 00:08:43,640 Hello? 20 00:09:46,600 --> 00:09:50,040 ls there anybody here? 21 00:09:52,800 --> 00:09:54,240 Guess not! 22 00:11:00,039 --> 00:11:02,159 Two years he walks the earth. 23 00:11:09,040 --> 00:11:11,320 No phone, no pool, no pets, 24 00:11:12,399 --> 00:11:13,839 no cigarettes. 25 00:11:30,560 --> 00:11:32,200 Ultimate freedom. 26 00:11:34,039 --> 00:11:37,879 An extremist. An aesthetic voyager 27 00:11:39,600 --> 00:11:43,600 whose home is the road. 28 00:11:44,519 --> 00:11:47,759 "Hey, listen, old man. Now, don't psychoanalyze me, all right? 29 00:11:48,079 --> 00:11:50,639 "Shut up. l'm taking you out to where we're going." 30 00:11:50,720 --> 00:11:52,240 "Where you going?" 31 00:11:52,400 --> 00:11:54,960 "l told you. We're going nowhere!" 32 00:11:57,399 --> 00:12:02,799 So now, after two rambling years comes the final and greatest adventure. 33 00:12:04,320 --> 00:12:07,440 The climactic battle to kill 34 00:12:08,799 --> 00:12:10,639 the false being within 35 00:12:11,759 --> 00:12:15,479 and victoriously conclude the spiritual revolution. 36 00:12:43,919 --> 00:12:48,399 No longer to be poisoned by civilization, he flees, 37 00:12:49,199 --> 00:12:51,879 and walks alone upon the land to become 38 00:12:53,199 --> 00:12:54,759 lost in the wild. 39 00:13:24,999 --> 00:13:29,839 ...hard work and manifold contributions to our community during their time here, 40 00:13:30,759 --> 00:13:33,959 we salute you and offer all of you 41 00:13:34,079 --> 00:13:37,039 one more round of applause and congratulations. 42 00:13:43,559 --> 00:13:46,239 Nina Lynn Lockwynn. 43 00:13:50,959 --> 00:13:54,039 Vanessa Denise Lowery. 44 00:13:58,239 --> 00:14:01,559 Christopher Johnson McCandless. 45 00:14:12,239 --> 00:14:15,319 Regina Victoria McNabb. 46 00:14:37,520 --> 00:14:41,040 l see them standing at the formal gates of their colleges. 47 00:14:44,080 --> 00:14:47,960 l see my father strolling out under the ochre sandstone arch, 48 00:14:48,360 --> 00:14:52,320 the red tiles glinting like bent plates of blood behind his head. 49 00:14:53,239 --> 00:14:55,879 l see my mother with a few light books at her hip, 50 00:14:55,959 --> 00:14:59,439 standing at the pillar made of tiny bricks with the wrought-iron gates 51 00:14:59,519 --> 00:15:03,439 still open behind her, its sword-tips black in the May air. 52 00:15:04,400 --> 00:15:06,400 They are about to graduate. 53 00:15:07,560 --> 00:15:12,120 They are about to get married. They are kids. They are dumb. 54 00:15:12,679 --> 00:15:16,559 All they know is they are innocent, they would never hurt anybody. 55 00:15:18,719 --> 00:15:22,279 l want to go up to them and say, "Stop, don't do it. 56 00:15:22,519 --> 00:15:25,959 "She's the wrong woman, he's the wrong man. 57 00:15:26,239 --> 00:15:30,159 "You are going to do things you cannot imagine you would ever do. 58 00:15:30,320 --> 00:15:33,280 "You are going to do bad things to children. 59 00:15:33,359 --> 00:15:35,839 "You are going to suffer in ways you never heard of. 60 00:15:35,919 --> 00:15:37,839 "You are going to want to die." 61 00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:44,080 l want to go up to them there in the late May sunlight and say it. 62 00:15:44,479 --> 00:15:47,319 But l don't do it. l want to live. 63 00:15:49,240 --> 00:15:53,120 l take them up like the male and female paper dolls, and bang them together 64 00:15:53,199 --> 00:15:57,999 at the hips like chips of flint, as if to strike sparks from them. l say, 65 00:15:59,439 --> 00:16:03,799 "Do what you are going to do and l will tell about it." 66 00:16:05,039 --> 00:16:07,399 Here they are, Walt. Okay? 67 00:16:08,279 --> 00:16:09,919 Who wrote that? 68 00:16:10,399 --> 00:16:14,719 Well, could have been either one of us, couldn't it? 69 00:16:14,799 --> 00:16:17,399 Why is he letting Carine drive his car? 70 00:16:18,159 --> 00:16:20,679 There's a lot of great poems in here. 71 00:16:25,359 --> 00:16:27,479 l have to speak to her about it. 72 00:16:27,559 --> 00:16:28,559 Sit down. 73 00:16:29,440 --> 00:16:31,200 Excuse me. l'm going to get my son. 74 00:16:31,279 --> 00:16:34,319 He just graduated today from Emory College. 75 00:16:34,399 --> 00:16:35,639 l'll get it. l'll get it. 76 00:16:35,719 --> 00:16:39,159 Chris, hi! We've been waiting and waiting. 77 00:16:39,239 --> 00:16:43,439 You scared me half to death jumping up there on that stage like that. 78 00:16:44,639 --> 00:16:46,799 -Hi, Dad. -Congratulations, Son. 79 00:16:46,919 --> 00:16:50,159 -This is a big step. -Thank you, Dad. 80 00:16:50,639 --> 00:16:51,919 All right. 81 00:16:53,119 --> 00:16:55,039 You're not supposed to be driving in Georgia. 82 00:16:55,119 --> 00:16:56,199 Why? l have my permit. 83 00:16:56,279 --> 00:16:58,399 'Cause it's against the law for a learner's permit 84 00:16:58,479 --> 00:17:01,759 to drive in another state from one's home state. That's why. 85 00:17:01,839 --> 00:17:05,119 l didn't know that. l thought that if l was with a legal driver that it'd be okay. 86 00:17:05,199 --> 00:17:06,159 Well, let's... 87 00:17:15,439 --> 00:17:18,359 -Are they going to continue? -No. 88 00:17:20,559 --> 00:17:23,119 l guess everybody's celebrating today. 89 00:17:23,319 --> 00:17:26,999 -They're going to stay in the bar, right? -That's right. 90 00:17:37,919 --> 00:17:41,439 My grades are good enough, l think, to get into Harvard Law. 91 00:17:41,519 --> 00:17:43,399 Chris, that's wonderful. 92 00:17:44,799 --> 00:17:46,799 That is a big deal. 93 00:17:47,439 --> 00:17:50,039 How much do you have left in the college fund? 94 00:17:50,479 --> 00:17:55,359 Exactly $24,500.68. 95 00:17:55,439 --> 00:17:57,039 Well, that's specific. 96 00:17:57,119 --> 00:17:59,759 l had to go to the bank this morning, Mom. 97 00:18:01,359 --> 00:18:05,359 Your mother and l will be glad to contribute the balance for Harvard. 98 00:18:05,440 --> 00:18:06,840 That's right. 99 00:18:07,119 --> 00:18:08,399 l've got to figure out what l'm going to do. 100 00:18:08,479 --> 00:18:11,799 l've got a lot of things to pack and organize here first. 101 00:18:11,880 --> 00:18:16,200 Your father and l, we want to make a present to you. 102 00:18:16,960 --> 00:18:19,480 We want to get you out of that junker. 103 00:18:19,999 --> 00:18:21,359 What junker? 104 00:18:21,799 --> 00:18:22,999 That. 105 00:18:25,319 --> 00:18:28,519 -We want to buy you a new car. -That's right. 106 00:18:28,639 --> 00:18:29,999 A new car? 107 00:18:32,159 --> 00:18:34,159 Why would l want a new car? 108 00:18:35,200 --> 00:18:36,840 Datsun runs great. 109 00:18:38,319 --> 00:18:40,999 Do you think l want some fancy boat? 110 00:18:42,759 --> 00:18:45,679 Are you worried what the neighbors might think? 111 00:18:45,839 --> 00:18:48,519 Well, we weren't gonna get you a brand new Cadillac, Chris. 112 00:18:48,599 --> 00:18:51,679 We just want to get you a nice new car that's safe to drive. 113 00:18:51,759 --> 00:18:55,199 And you never know when that thing out there just might blow up. 114 00:18:55,279 --> 00:19:01,239 Blow up. Blow up? Are you guys crazy? lt's a great car. 115 00:19:01,759 --> 00:19:05,839 l don't need a new car. l don't want a new car. 116 00:19:06,159 --> 00:19:08,159 -l don't want anything. -Okay. 117 00:19:08,239 --> 00:19:11,839 -These things, things, things, things. -Okay. 118 00:19:11,919 --> 00:19:13,639 -Everything has to be difficult. -Thank you. 119 00:19:13,719 --> 00:19:15,719 -Thank you. -Maybe that's not what he means. 120 00:19:15,799 --> 00:19:19,319 Maybe he just wants his old car. lt's not such a big deal. 121 00:19:21,519 --> 00:19:24,079 Thank you. l just don't want anything. 122 00:19:33,079 --> 00:19:35,359 Chris measured himself and those around him 123 00:19:35,439 --> 00:19:37,919 by a fiercely rigorous moral code. 124 00:19:37,999 --> 00:19:39,079 Bye, Chris! 125 00:19:39,399 --> 00:19:42,359 He risked what could have been a relentlessly lonely path 126 00:19:42,439 --> 00:19:45,999 but found company in the characters of the books he loved 127 00:19:48,519 --> 00:19:52,559 from writers like Tolstoy, Jack London and Thoreau. 128 00:19:54,159 --> 00:19:57,199 He could summon their words to suit any occasion, 129 00:19:57,959 --> 00:19:59,599 and he often would. 130 00:20:14,359 --> 00:20:19,199 l forgot to ask what quote he'd have picked for his graduation dinner, 131 00:20:19,279 --> 00:20:22,719 but l had a good idea of who the primary target would be. 132 00:20:27,359 --> 00:20:30,239 lt was inevitable that Chris would break away. 133 00:20:32,199 --> 00:20:36,079 And when he did, he would do it with characteristic immoderation. 134 00:21:20,239 --> 00:21:24,399 "lt should not be denied that being footloose has always exhilarated us. 135 00:21:25,359 --> 00:21:28,159 "lt is associated in our minds with escape 136 00:21:29,279 --> 00:21:32,959 "from history and oppression and law and irksome obligations. 137 00:21:34,399 --> 00:21:36,079 "Absolute freedom. 138 00:21:38,239 --> 00:21:40,559 "And the road has always led west." 139 00:23:35,879 --> 00:23:37,319 l need a name. 140 00:24:05,479 --> 00:24:07,279 Toward the end of June, 141 00:24:07,359 --> 00:24:10,279 Emory had mailed our parents Chris' final grade report. 142 00:24:10,798 --> 00:24:12,358 Almost all A's. 143 00:24:12,759 --> 00:24:15,399 A in Apartheid in South African Society. 144 00:24:16,158 --> 00:24:20,518 A-minus in Contemporary African Politics and the Food Crisis in Africa. 145 00:24:21,358 --> 00:24:24,598 And on it went. Clever boy, my brother. 146 00:24:26,158 --> 00:24:29,678 But by the end of July, we hadn't heard anything from him 147 00:24:29,759 --> 00:24:32,199 and my parents were becoming unsettled. 148 00:24:33,718 --> 00:24:35,998 Chris had never had a phone, 149 00:24:36,079 --> 00:24:39,439 so they decided to drive down to Atlanta and surprise him. 150 00:24:53,919 --> 00:24:56,559 When they arrived at the apartment, there was a "For Rent" sign up 151 00:24:56,639 --> 00:24:59,999 and the manager said that Chris had moved out at the end of May. 152 00:25:00,079 --> 00:25:02,039 Oh, yes. He left two months ago. 153 00:25:02,319 --> 00:25:04,239 So when they got home, 154 00:25:04,318 --> 00:25:08,278 l had to hand them all the letters that they had sent Chris that summer, 155 00:25:08,838 --> 00:25:12,518 which had been returned in a bundle. 156 00:25:12,879 --> 00:25:16,919 Chris had arranged for the post office to hold them until August 1st, 157 00:25:16,999 --> 00:25:19,759 to buy himself some time. 158 00:25:20,758 --> 00:25:22,718 Did you know about this? 159 00:25:23,279 --> 00:25:25,119 He didn't say anything. 160 00:25:25,719 --> 00:25:29,119 l understood what he was doing. That he had spent four years 161 00:25:29,199 --> 00:25:33,119 fulfilling the absurd and tedious duty of graduating from college, 162 00:25:35,639 --> 00:25:39,919 and now he was emancipated from that world of abstraction, 163 00:25:39,999 --> 00:25:44,359 false security, parents and material excess, 164 00:25:45,318 --> 00:25:48,998 the things that cut Chris off from the truth of his existence. 165 00:27:00,239 --> 00:27:01,359 Hey! 166 00:27:05,199 --> 00:27:07,959 -Hey, man. Step around. Jump in. -Okay, great. 167 00:27:08,519 --> 00:27:11,639 We barely saw you there underneath that crazy hat of yours. 168 00:27:11,759 --> 00:27:15,319 This door's a little tricky. There you go. Hop in. 169 00:27:18,799 --> 00:27:19,959 That's Rainey. 170 00:27:20,039 --> 00:27:21,679 -Hi, Rainey. -Yeah, l'm Rainey. 171 00:27:21,759 --> 00:27:23,359 -l'm Jan. -Hi. l'm Alex. 172 00:27:23,439 --> 00:27:24,719 Alex with the hat on. 173 00:27:24,799 --> 00:27:26,799 -Yeah, l know. You said it, man. -Yeah. 174 00:27:28,479 --> 00:27:30,359 So you're a leather now. 175 00:27:31,559 --> 00:27:32,599 l'm a leather? 176 00:27:32,678 --> 00:27:37,598 Yeah, a leather tramp. That's what they call the ones that hoof it, go on foot. 177 00:27:38,399 --> 00:27:40,519 Technically we're rubber tramps. 178 00:27:40,599 --> 00:27:42,559 Because we have a vehicle. 179 00:27:43,678 --> 00:27:46,838 -You don't have to push me away. -Come on, please? 180 00:27:48,279 --> 00:27:53,199 Yeah, Alex could have a vehicle as well, but he decided to burn all of his money. 181 00:27:55,399 --> 00:27:57,279 And why did you do that? 182 00:27:58,959 --> 00:28:02,159 l don't need money. Makes people cautious. 183 00:28:04,398 --> 00:28:06,878 Come on, Alex. You gotta be a little cautious. 184 00:28:06,958 --> 00:28:09,918 l mean, that book of yours is cool and everything, 185 00:28:10,158 --> 00:28:13,158 but you can't depend entirely on leaves and berries. 186 00:28:14,238 --> 00:28:17,718 l don't know if you want to depend on much more than that. 187 00:28:18,559 --> 00:28:20,559 Where are your mom and dad? 188 00:28:23,438 --> 00:28:25,558 Living their lies somewhere. 189 00:28:28,439 --> 00:28:30,879 You look like a loved kid. Be fair. 190 00:28:31,999 --> 00:28:33,039 Fair? 191 00:28:33,998 --> 00:28:35,758 You know what l mean. 192 00:28:38,678 --> 00:28:40,838 l'll paraphrase Thoreau here. 193 00:28:41,798 --> 00:28:45,918 "Rather than love, than money, than faith, 194 00:28:45,999 --> 00:28:49,879 "than fame, than fairness, 195 00:28:52,199 --> 00:28:53,719 "give me truth." 196 00:29:14,279 --> 00:29:17,199 From as long ago as Chris and I couId remember, 197 00:29:17,358 --> 00:29:20,398 there have been daily bouts of rage in our house. 198 00:29:20,478 --> 00:29:24,798 Violence that we were forced to witness. lt was very real. 199 00:29:26,638 --> 00:29:29,118 But it was also like theater. 200 00:29:30,559 --> 00:29:34,359 They cast us as both judges and the accused. 201 00:29:34,679 --> 00:29:40,079 And l got you this token, this expensive token. 202 00:29:40,479 --> 00:29:42,559 Dad had been the young genius 203 00:29:42,639 --> 00:29:47,239 that NASA enlisted to do crucial designs for the American satellite radar systems 204 00:29:47,319 --> 00:29:51,679 that would be our answer to the Russian Sputnik. 205 00:29:51,758 --> 00:29:54,078 And Mom and he later started up a consulting firm 206 00:29:54,159 --> 00:29:57,479 combining her get-up-and-go resourcefulness 207 00:29:57,558 --> 00:29:59,118 with his wealth of knowledge. 208 00:29:59,198 --> 00:30:01,318 Look at this. 209 00:30:04,238 --> 00:30:07,798 But by the time the company actually made its first million, 210 00:30:08,118 --> 00:30:12,718 the careerism and money seemed only to embolden their blindness. 211 00:30:13,318 --> 00:30:15,238 Thank you very, very much. 212 00:30:16,239 --> 00:30:18,679 l remember the first family meeting 213 00:30:18,999 --> 00:30:22,319 to let us in on their plans for getting a divorce. 214 00:30:23,038 --> 00:30:26,318 They wanted us to choose which of them we'd live with. 215 00:30:28,238 --> 00:30:29,998 We cried our eyes out. 216 00:30:32,159 --> 00:30:34,279 The divorce never happened, 217 00:30:34,958 --> 00:30:37,998 but the battles and the meetings never stopped. 218 00:30:39,198 --> 00:30:42,158 lt wasn't very long before Chris and l shut off. 219 00:30:43,959 --> 00:30:46,639 We'd say "Go ahead. 220 00:30:48,158 --> 00:30:49,758 "Get the divorce." 221 00:30:51,118 --> 00:30:55,838 Jeez. lf l struck a match to you l'd have dinner and warmth at the same time. 222 00:30:56,878 --> 00:30:58,478 Where's Jan going? 223 00:31:00,878 --> 00:31:02,438 Well, my friend, 224 00:31:03,918 --> 00:31:06,318 all is not well on the hippie front. 225 00:31:15,598 --> 00:31:18,638 You're an industrious little fucker, aren't you? 226 00:31:19,798 --> 00:31:21,118 Little bit. 227 00:31:25,878 --> 00:31:30,118 lt's funny how things happen at particular times. 228 00:31:31,998 --> 00:31:35,318 l've loved that woman for a lot of years, bro. 229 00:31:38,158 --> 00:31:40,718 But, you know, she's got a story. 230 00:31:41,598 --> 00:31:45,678 We've been going through this thing, real quiet. 231 00:31:48,198 --> 00:31:52,118 So when we ran into you yesterday, 232 00:31:52,558 --> 00:31:55,758 this thing that we've been going through real quiet, 233 00:31:56,758 --> 00:31:59,598 she's talking about it. You know what l mean? 234 00:32:00,079 --> 00:32:02,879 -l think l do. -You think what? 235 00:32:05,678 --> 00:32:06,638 Well... 236 00:32:09,598 --> 00:32:13,358 Some people feel like they don't deserve love. 237 00:32:13,718 --> 00:32:17,958 They walk away quietly into empty spaces, 238 00:32:19,518 --> 00:32:22,478 trying to close the gaps to the past. 239 00:32:22,638 --> 00:32:25,598 That's a hell of an insight. Jesus! 240 00:32:28,438 --> 00:32:31,318 -You're not Jesus, are you? -Look who's talking. 241 00:32:31,398 --> 00:32:35,918 You gonna walk across the water and get her back for me, pal? 242 00:32:36,638 --> 00:32:40,198 No. l'm afraid of water. 243 00:32:40,799 --> 00:32:42,359 Always have been. 244 00:32:42,638 --> 00:32:48,238 Something l've gotta get over sometime though, huh? So l will swim in it 245 00:32:48,558 --> 00:32:51,278 if you'll carry the firewood back to camp. 246 00:32:53,478 --> 00:32:55,038 -Shit, yeah. -Yeah? 247 00:32:55,118 --> 00:32:57,518 -Call it carried. -All right. 248 00:33:30,838 --> 00:33:33,518 "The sea's only gifts are harsh blows, 249 00:33:37,078 --> 00:33:39,918 "and, occasionally, the chance to feel strong. 250 00:33:40,558 --> 00:33:44,078 "Now, l don't know much about the sea, 251 00:33:44,678 --> 00:33:47,598 "but l do know that that's the way it is here. 252 00:33:49,078 --> 00:33:51,478 "And l also know how important it is in life 253 00:33:51,558 --> 00:33:55,438 "not necessarily to be strong, but to feel strong, 254 00:33:56,598 --> 00:33:59,038 "to measure yourself at least once, 255 00:34:00,598 --> 00:34:04,878 "to find yourself at least once in the most ancient of human conditions, 256 00:34:06,478 --> 00:34:08,958 "facing the blind, deaf stone alone 257 00:34:09,518 --> 00:34:13,518 "with nothing to help you but your hands and your own head." 258 00:34:18,478 --> 00:34:20,678 There's a big wave coming! 259 00:34:24,278 --> 00:34:26,758 Rainey, l'm freezing! 260 00:34:27,278 --> 00:34:31,318 Could you put your arms around me? 261 00:34:52,398 --> 00:34:56,838 The Navy bulldozed and abandoned this base down there, 262 00:34:56,918 --> 00:35:03,638 and all that's left is this huge grid of concrete foundations, or slabs. 263 00:35:04,278 --> 00:35:07,958 -Man, you would dig the Slabs. -You would like it. You would like it. 264 00:35:08,038 --> 00:35:10,158 -lf you're on the road still. -You'd love it. 265 00:35:10,238 --> 00:35:11,638 Fellow travelers. 266 00:35:11,718 --> 00:35:14,238 Just living on the cheap under the sun. Can't beat it. 267 00:35:14,318 --> 00:35:15,638 Sounds good. 268 00:35:15,838 --> 00:35:18,358 lf you come, l'll make you a proper hat. 269 00:35:18,438 --> 00:35:21,438 -Promise? -l swear to God. 270 00:35:28,838 --> 00:35:31,518 Oh, baby. Baby. 271 00:35:31,918 --> 00:35:34,318 -Stop it. Wait. -Yeah. 272 00:35:36,878 --> 00:35:39,238 -Oh, yes. -Okay. 273 00:35:40,758 --> 00:35:42,438 Let me turn off the light. 274 00:36:22,558 --> 00:36:26,478 -He reminded me of... -l know. 275 00:36:34,958 --> 00:36:37,878 Such is the way of the world 276 00:36:37,958 --> 00:36:40,358 You can never know 277 00:36:43,158 --> 00:36:48,838 Just where to put all your faith And how will it grow? 278 00:36:50,518 --> 00:36:53,118 Gonna rise up 279 00:36:53,198 --> 00:36:57,638 Burning back holes in dark memories 280 00:36:58,358 --> 00:37:00,878 Gonna rise up 281 00:37:00,958 --> 00:37:05,118 Turning mistakes into gold 282 00:37:05,198 --> 00:37:08,718 l mean, you're really good. l mean, you're like 283 00:37:09,918 --> 00:37:14,638 1 00,000 times better than, like, any apple l've ever had. 284 00:37:16,358 --> 00:37:18,638 l'm not Superman, l'm Supertramp. 285 00:37:20,718 --> 00:37:22,558 You're Superapple. 286 00:37:22,638 --> 00:37:29,078 You're so tasty. You're so organic, so natural. 287 00:37:30,197 --> 00:37:32,237 You're the apple of my eye. 288 00:37:34,478 --> 00:37:40,758 Hey! Such is the passage of time Too fast to fold 289 00:37:42,398 --> 00:37:48,278 And suddenly swallowed by signs Lo and behold 290 00:37:49,518 --> 00:37:52,238 Gonna rise up 291 00:37:52,318 --> 00:37:56,718 Find my direction magnetically 292 00:37:57,357 --> 00:37:59,837 Gonna rise up 293 00:37:59,918 --> 00:38:04,238 Throw down my ace in the hole 294 00:38:06,318 --> 00:38:10,558 ln early September, Mom and Dad got a call from the Annandale police 295 00:38:10,638 --> 00:38:12,638 notifying them that Chris' abandoned car 296 00:38:12,717 --> 00:38:15,997 had been identified by the Arizona Highway Patrol. 297 00:38:16,438 --> 00:38:20,478 A group of rare flower hunters stumbled upon it in the desert. 298 00:38:21,758 --> 00:38:25,158 There were no signs that Chris had intended to return to it. 299 00:38:25,238 --> 00:38:28,278 But there wasn't any evidence of struggle, either. 300 00:38:30,118 --> 00:38:32,438 The police thought Chris had chosen to leave it behind 301 00:38:32,518 --> 00:38:35,118 and not that it was taken from him. 302 00:38:38,518 --> 00:38:43,278 The initial comfort that gave Mom and Dad quickly turned 303 00:38:43,358 --> 00:38:47,918 to the realization that Chris was actually trying not to be found. 304 00:39:27,358 --> 00:39:28,718 Strong. 305 00:39:29,918 --> 00:39:34,118 You can do anything. You can go anywhere. 306 00:39:34,798 --> 00:39:40,638 Money, power is an illusion. lt's up here. 307 00:39:42,078 --> 00:39:43,598 You can be here. 308 00:39:44,798 --> 00:39:47,238 Me and you. 309 00:40:01,077 --> 00:40:05,477 One, two. No, no, no. 310 00:40:12,878 --> 00:40:14,318 Two, 311 00:40:18,798 --> 00:40:19,918 three... 312 00:41:08,798 --> 00:41:10,998 Don't be shy with it. Get it moving there. That's good. 313 00:41:11,518 --> 00:41:13,278 -That's your speed right here. -Right. 314 00:41:14,437 --> 00:41:16,397 You go too fast, you won't get all the wheat. 315 00:41:16,517 --> 00:41:19,197 That's it, straight line, straight line, little straighter. 316 00:41:19,278 --> 00:41:22,478 See how you're bearing? Just a little straighter. Now you're a combiner. 317 00:41:22,558 --> 00:41:24,558 Wow, look at this view! 318 00:41:24,638 --> 00:41:27,198 But keep your eye on the wheat, here. Make sure you're cutting it. 319 00:41:27,278 --> 00:41:30,358 You can look back here and see how much is coming out, all right. 320 00:41:30,438 --> 00:41:31,998 -How do you feel? -l feel great. 321 00:41:32,078 --> 00:41:35,038 Okay, keep it straight. God bless you. 322 00:41:35,118 --> 00:41:37,318 Make yourself some money, my friend. l'll see you in a little bit. 323 00:41:37,398 --> 00:41:38,438 Okay. 324 00:41:44,877 --> 00:41:48,557 Wayne. Where you going? 325 00:42:06,638 --> 00:42:10,798 Kevin, you know l love you. l'm joking with you. l'm joking. Stop it. 326 00:42:10,918 --> 00:42:14,078 -l'm joking with you. -Mind your own business, Wayne! 327 00:42:14,158 --> 00:42:16,238 -What are you getting so hostile for? -l don't know. 328 00:42:16,317 --> 00:42:18,557 Me and you are on the same side. We're on the same side. 329 00:42:18,637 --> 00:42:21,597 -l'm just tired of the teasing a lot. -Kevin, we're on the same side. 330 00:42:21,678 --> 00:42:26,118 Let me get some... lf l want some vagina, let me get it. 331 00:42:26,197 --> 00:42:28,637 -Whoa. He's serious about this. -Let's just play cards. 332 00:42:28,718 --> 00:42:30,238 -Can we just play cards? -Let's go, then. 333 00:42:30,318 --> 00:42:32,958 $2, $4, $6, just put all the money in. 334 00:42:33,037 --> 00:42:34,797 l just wanna see everybody going for broke. 335 00:42:34,878 --> 00:42:37,358 -You want to play? -No. 336 00:42:51,677 --> 00:42:53,437 -Kevin, what have you got for the week? -l got 260. 337 00:42:53,518 --> 00:42:55,158 We're at 260. 338 00:43:01,358 --> 00:43:03,158 We're gonna stay right at 260, that's our number. 339 00:43:03,238 --> 00:43:04,998 We've got 20,000 pounds. 340 00:43:05,078 --> 00:43:08,798 We've got 20,000 pounds we need to get rid of. 341 00:43:11,557 --> 00:43:15,357 Maybe just do all that after lunch before we get back into everything else. 342 00:43:15,437 --> 00:43:18,797 Can we do the $500 reserves... 343 00:43:27,317 --> 00:43:29,757 What do you think about all this? 344 00:43:30,558 --> 00:43:32,078 l like all this. 345 00:43:43,677 --> 00:43:45,957 l don't think he can do it. 346 00:43:48,958 --> 00:43:50,958 ls there a library or bookstore around here 347 00:43:51,038 --> 00:43:53,038 where l can get books on hunting and preserving? 348 00:43:53,117 --> 00:43:55,037 Anything at all to do with hunting or preserving the meat, 349 00:43:55,118 --> 00:43:57,118 smoking it, whatever the hell it is, 350 00:43:57,198 --> 00:43:59,958 talk to Kevin over there. That's your man. 351 00:44:00,277 --> 00:44:03,357 Outdoorsman. What's your fascination with all that stuff? 352 00:44:03,437 --> 00:44:04,997 l'm going to Alaska. 353 00:44:05,317 --> 00:44:08,117 Alaska, Alaska? Or city Alaska? 354 00:44:08,197 --> 00:44:10,637 Because they do have markets in Alaska. 355 00:44:10,718 --> 00:44:13,758 The city ofAlaska. Not in Alaska. ln the city ofAlaska, they have markets. 356 00:44:13,837 --> 00:44:16,997 No, man. Alaska, Alaska. 357 00:44:17,517 --> 00:44:21,157 l'm gonna be all the way out there, all the way fucking out there. 358 00:44:21,838 --> 00:44:22,998 Just on my own. 359 00:44:23,078 --> 00:44:28,358 You know, no fucking watch, no map, no ax, no nothing. No nothing. 360 00:44:28,438 --> 00:44:31,038 Just be out there. Just be out there in it. 361 00:44:31,117 --> 00:44:35,317 You know, big mountains, rivers, sky, game. 362 00:44:35,397 --> 00:44:39,117 Just be out there in it, you know? ln the wild. 363 00:44:39,278 --> 00:44:41,118 -ln the wild. -Just wild. 364 00:44:41,198 --> 00:44:43,118 -Yeah. -Just... 365 00:44:43,238 --> 00:44:44,238 What are you doing when we're there? 366 00:44:44,317 --> 00:44:46,437 Now you're in the wild, what are we doing? 367 00:44:46,518 --> 00:44:47,638 You're just living, man. 368 00:44:47,717 --> 00:44:50,997 You're just there, in that moment, in that special place and time. 369 00:44:51,078 --> 00:44:52,238 Yeah. 370 00:44:52,357 --> 00:44:54,797 Maybe when l get back, l can write a book about my travels. 371 00:44:54,877 --> 00:44:55,837 Why not? 372 00:44:55,917 --> 00:44:57,917 You know, about getting out of this sick society. 373 00:44:57,997 --> 00:45:00,677 -Society! -Society! 374 00:45:00,757 --> 00:45:02,277 -Society, man! -Society! 375 00:45:02,357 --> 00:45:04,477 -Society! Society! -Society! 376 00:45:04,557 --> 00:45:07,197 Society, you know! Society! 377 00:45:07,958 --> 00:45:10,518 'Cause you know what l don't understand? 378 00:45:10,597 --> 00:45:14,397 l don't understand why people, why every fucking person 379 00:45:14,477 --> 00:45:17,717 is so bad to each other so fucking often. 380 00:45:17,798 --> 00:45:22,718 lt doesn't make sense to me. Judgment. Control. All that, the whole spectrum. 381 00:45:22,797 --> 00:45:26,477 -Well, it just... -What "people" we talking about? 382 00:45:28,037 --> 00:45:32,557 You know, parents, hypocrites, 383 00:45:33,397 --> 00:45:36,717 politicians, pricks. 384 00:45:38,278 --> 00:45:40,638 This is a mistake. 385 00:45:40,718 --> 00:45:44,238 lt's a mistake to get too deep into all that kind of stuff. 386 00:45:46,797 --> 00:45:49,917 Alex, you're a hell of a young guy, a hell of a young guy. 387 00:45:51,438 --> 00:45:53,278 But l promise you this. 388 00:45:54,438 --> 00:45:58,838 You're a young guy! Can't be juggling blood and fire all the time! 389 00:45:59,277 --> 00:46:02,397 -You've got to just kind of... -Wayne, what are you talking about? 390 00:46:02,477 --> 00:46:03,837 -What? -l mean... 391 00:46:03,918 --> 00:46:05,118 l'm talking about blood and fire. 392 00:46:05,197 --> 00:46:07,197 We're talking about trying to juggle blood and fire. 393 00:46:07,277 --> 00:46:08,917 Who are you to be giving advice to anybody anyway? 394 00:46:08,998 --> 00:46:10,518 Who am l to be giving advice to anybody? 395 00:46:10,598 --> 00:46:12,158 -Yes. -Well, it's nice to meet you. 396 00:46:12,237 --> 00:46:13,957 -My name is Mr. Happy. -Mr. Happy. 397 00:46:14,038 --> 00:46:16,198 And Mr. Happy sometimes gives advice. 398 00:46:16,277 --> 00:46:18,237 -Alex, please. -l'm sorry. 399 00:46:18,318 --> 00:46:20,838 Sometimes Mr. Happy... Well, Mr. Happy is always happy. 400 00:46:20,918 --> 00:46:22,318 But you know when he's happiest? 401 00:46:22,398 --> 00:46:23,718 -He's not always happy. -When is he happy? 402 00:46:23,798 --> 00:46:26,238 Are you really gonna say that to me? Come on, tell me about it. 403 00:46:26,317 --> 00:46:28,197 l am going to say that to you. 404 00:46:32,877 --> 00:46:35,277 -Now... -Sit down before you hurt yourself. 405 00:46:35,357 --> 00:46:38,437 One thing that you should try to keep your eye on 406 00:46:39,077 --> 00:46:41,997 is what happened in the late 1 940s in Roswell. 407 00:46:55,397 --> 00:46:57,517 When a search of tax records revealed that 408 00:46:57,597 --> 00:47:00,077 Chris had given his life savings to charity, 409 00:47:00,398 --> 00:47:04,558 Mom and Dad became what Dad called "mobilized." 410 00:47:04,637 --> 00:47:08,957 They hired a private investigator and notified law enforcement nationwide, 411 00:47:09,237 --> 00:47:11,517 determined to track him down. 412 00:47:11,798 --> 00:47:16,198 l just figured he'd be with gypsies, far from the eyes of the law. 413 00:47:20,117 --> 00:47:22,397 These are those free satellite TV deals. 414 00:47:22,478 --> 00:47:25,278 You're the one who said it, Alex, not me. 415 00:47:27,438 --> 00:47:29,758 You're gonna need something. What kind of gun you got? 416 00:47:29,837 --> 00:47:33,997 l'm probably gonna get like a .22, l think. A .22 caliber rifle. 417 00:47:36,117 --> 00:47:37,517 All right, then. 418 00:47:37,957 --> 00:47:40,637 When you get your kill, time is of the essence. 419 00:47:40,718 --> 00:47:42,718 Now, the first thing you wanna do is make sure 420 00:47:42,798 --> 00:47:45,678 that you got that meat nice and shaved up. 421 00:47:45,837 --> 00:47:48,237 And you don't have a lot of time to do this. This is about an hour or two. 422 00:47:48,317 --> 00:47:52,077 Depending on the weather. Especially if it's hot, you've got less time to do it. 423 00:47:52,157 --> 00:47:56,157 What you do is you want to make sure that them flies don't land on your meat. 424 00:47:56,238 --> 00:47:59,918 Because once them flies start shitting out larvae and them maggots, 425 00:48:00,597 --> 00:48:04,477 you know, those creepy crawlies, it's too late. lt's too late. 426 00:49:09,198 --> 00:49:11,518 You got me. You got me. 427 00:49:17,077 --> 00:49:19,557 l warned Wayne about them little black boxes. 428 00:49:19,717 --> 00:49:23,197 Mr. Westerberg, Scott Baker, FBl. l think you know why we're here. 429 00:49:23,277 --> 00:49:25,357 -lmpressive turn-out. -Yeah. 430 00:49:25,437 --> 00:49:28,397 You mind grabbing that zipper for me there? Thank you. 431 00:49:29,117 --> 00:49:30,157 -Let's go. -Sorry, boys. 432 00:49:30,237 --> 00:49:32,397 We're gonna have to shut down for a little while. 433 00:49:32,477 --> 00:49:35,117 Alex, you come back and work for me any time you want. 434 00:49:35,197 --> 00:49:37,797 Gil's got your checks, guys. l shouldn't be away too long. 435 00:49:37,877 --> 00:49:42,557 Remember Alex, no Alaska till spring. South, kid. You wanna head south. 436 00:50:07,078 --> 00:50:09,358 The year Chris graduated high school, 437 00:50:09,437 --> 00:50:12,717 he bought the Datsun used and drove it cross-country. 438 00:50:13,997 --> 00:50:16,077 He stayed away most of the summer. 439 00:50:16,637 --> 00:50:19,037 Come on. The neighbors are gonna be watching, honey. 440 00:50:19,117 --> 00:50:20,397 Can you spray it? 441 00:50:25,517 --> 00:50:29,517 As soon as l heard he was home, l ran into his room to talk to him. 442 00:50:34,117 --> 00:50:37,557 In CaIifornia, he'd looked up some old family friends. 443 00:50:38,317 --> 00:50:42,957 He discovered that our parents' stories of how they fell in love and got married 444 00:50:43,037 --> 00:50:45,797 were calculated lies masking an ugly truth. 445 00:50:46,957 --> 00:50:49,517 When they met, Dad was already married. 446 00:50:50,477 --> 00:50:52,637 And even after Chris was born, 447 00:50:52,717 --> 00:50:55,477 Dad had had another son with his first wife, Marcia, 448 00:50:56,757 --> 00:50:59,277 to whom he was still legally married. 449 00:51:01,157 --> 00:51:06,157 This fact suddenly re-defined Chris and me as bastard children. 450 00:51:10,597 --> 00:51:15,157 Dad's arrogance made him conveniently oblivious to the pain he caused. 451 00:51:16,797 --> 00:51:20,717 And Mom, in the shame and embarrassment of a young mistress, 452 00:51:21,317 --> 00:51:23,717 became his accomplice in deceit. 453 00:51:28,917 --> 00:51:32,517 The fragility of crystal is not a weakness but a fineness. 454 00:51:33,637 --> 00:51:36,637 My parents understood that a fine crystal glass had to be cared for 455 00:51:36,717 --> 00:51:39,037 or it may be shattered. 456 00:51:39,117 --> 00:51:43,197 But when it came to my brother, they did not seem to know or care 457 00:51:43,277 --> 00:51:45,437 that their course of secret action 458 00:51:45,517 --> 00:51:49,437 brought the kind of devastation that could cut them. 459 00:51:51,038 --> 00:51:55,478 Their fraudulent marriage and our father's denial of this other son 460 00:51:55,757 --> 00:51:59,757 was, for Chris, a murder of every day's truth. 461 00:52:00,837 --> 00:52:04,517 He felt his whole life turn, like a river suddenly reversing 462 00:52:04,597 --> 00:52:08,517 the direction of its flow, suddenly running uphill. 463 00:52:14,957 --> 00:52:19,357 These revelations struck at the core of Chris' sense of identity. 464 00:52:19,437 --> 00:52:23,317 They made his entire childhood seem like fiction. 465 00:52:25,357 --> 00:52:26,877 Chris never told them he knew 466 00:52:30,157 --> 00:52:32,597 and made me promise silence, as well. 467 00:52:33,357 --> 00:52:35,517 l can't afford four. Who's gonna pay for the fourth one? 468 00:52:35,597 --> 00:52:38,637 Bryan can't afford four. Does it matter? 469 00:52:39,437 --> 00:52:40,917 Can l help you? 470 00:52:40,997 --> 00:52:43,357 Yeah. lf l wanted to paddle down the river, 471 00:52:43,437 --> 00:52:45,517 where's the best place to launch out of? 472 00:52:45,597 --> 00:52:46,717 Hang on a second. 473 00:52:46,797 --> 00:52:49,877 "To launch out of?" What's your experience level? 474 00:52:50,957 --> 00:52:54,117 -Not much. -Any? Do you have a permit? 475 00:52:54,197 --> 00:52:56,157 A permit? Permit for what? 476 00:52:56,677 --> 00:52:58,917 You can't paddle down the river without a permit. 477 00:52:58,997 --> 00:53:01,277 lf you want, you can apply for one here, get some experience, 478 00:53:01,357 --> 00:53:03,197 and l'll put you on the wait-list. 479 00:53:03,277 --> 00:53:05,837 No, l got this guy in here. We'll figure it out. 480 00:53:05,917 --> 00:53:08,397 There's a wait-list to paddle down a river? 481 00:53:08,477 --> 00:53:09,837 That's right. 482 00:53:10,117 --> 00:53:12,277 -Yeah, it's gonna be... -Well, how long do l have to wait? 483 00:53:12,357 --> 00:53:13,757 Yeah, hang on a second. 484 00:53:13,837 --> 00:53:17,717 Now, the deal is it's gonna be me and you 485 00:53:17,797 --> 00:53:20,997 or it's gonna be me, you and her. 486 00:53:21,077 --> 00:53:25,477 Next available is May 1 7th, 2003. 487 00:53:26,317 --> 00:53:30,157 Great. Done. The three of us, then. 488 00:53:30,357 --> 00:53:31,757 Twelve years? 489 00:53:32,197 --> 00:53:34,077 -What's that? -Twelve years? 490 00:53:34,237 --> 00:53:35,757 To paddle down a river. 491 00:53:35,837 --> 00:53:37,597 Let me call you back. 492 00:53:38,197 --> 00:53:39,957 You can do that, 493 00:53:40,037 --> 00:53:43,037 or you can join a commercial raft trip, go with a licensed guide. 494 00:53:43,117 --> 00:53:44,797 They may have some last-minute cancellations, 495 00:53:44,877 --> 00:53:47,317 but that's gonna cost you $2,000. 496 00:53:49,037 --> 00:53:50,717 Thank you very much. 497 00:54:26,917 --> 00:54:28,477 Helmet, man! 498 00:55:06,317 --> 00:55:07,477 l'm Supertramp! 499 00:55:20,037 --> 00:55:23,277 "lf we admit that human life can be ruled by reason, 500 00:55:23,997 --> 00:55:26,477 "the possibility of life is destroyed." 501 00:55:55,757 --> 00:55:57,157 Hello! 502 00:55:59,517 --> 00:56:00,637 Hello. 503 00:56:01,317 --> 00:56:03,677 Come. Join us. 504 00:56:04,877 --> 00:56:06,317 We have hot dogs. 505 00:56:21,076 --> 00:56:22,556 -l'm Mads. -Mads? 506 00:56:22,637 --> 00:56:24,157 -Mads. Hi. -Mads. 507 00:56:24,236 --> 00:56:25,996 -Alex. -Hi, Alex. 508 00:56:26,077 --> 00:56:28,037 Hey. l'm Sonja. 509 00:56:28,797 --> 00:56:30,317 Hey, Alex. 510 00:56:31,677 --> 00:56:35,717 We are from Copenhagen, and you are from the rapids. 511 00:56:36,557 --> 00:56:37,637 l am. 512 00:56:44,477 --> 00:56:46,557 -You're crazy! You're crazy, man. -My God! 513 00:56:46,637 --> 00:56:49,557 Sonja, get away from him. Get away from him. He's crazy! Look, he's crazy. 514 00:56:49,637 --> 00:56:51,757 l'll make you a hot dog. One minute. 515 00:56:54,676 --> 00:56:57,756 l love this. Don't you love this? 516 00:56:57,957 --> 00:57:01,197 You know, this is nature. 517 00:57:09,957 --> 00:57:11,757 So where are you going? 518 00:57:12,396 --> 00:57:14,836 -l haven't decided yet. -Really? 519 00:57:14,917 --> 00:57:18,117 Well, we like it here very much. And it's so good to meet you, man. 520 00:57:18,197 --> 00:57:19,277 So good to meet you. 521 00:57:19,357 --> 00:57:23,237 You know, we went to Los Angeles, and then we went to Las Vegas. 522 00:57:23,317 --> 00:57:27,997 Oh, yeah. Las Vegas is very nice. The universe is so good. 523 00:57:32,717 --> 00:57:35,397 -The universe is very good. -You know what l mean? 524 00:57:35,477 --> 00:57:37,637 -Yeah. -The whole universe. 525 00:57:37,797 --> 00:57:41,917 Just the place. The city, she means. Her English is not very good. 526 00:57:42,037 --> 00:57:46,797 But then we came here. l don't care if she's a little stupid, but l like her. 527 00:57:47,916 --> 00:57:50,396 You know you can actually go all the way down to Mexico from here. 528 00:57:50,477 --> 00:57:51,477 -Yeah? -Yeah. 529 00:57:51,557 --> 00:57:55,917 You can take the kayak, and you can take it all the way around 530 00:57:55,996 --> 00:57:58,276 down to Hoover Dam, you can sail around, 531 00:57:58,357 --> 00:58:02,637 and then from there you can take the river all the way down to Mexico! 532 00:58:03,077 --> 00:58:04,717 -Really? -Yeah. 533 00:58:08,317 --> 00:58:10,157 Come on, come on! 534 00:58:10,637 --> 00:58:12,877 She's so slow sometimes. 535 00:58:13,836 --> 00:58:17,236 -Here's the map. -But l like her. 536 00:58:19,996 --> 00:58:21,836 -Here. Hoover Dam. -Okay. 537 00:58:22,036 --> 00:58:24,196 About 330 kilometers, l think. 538 00:58:24,277 --> 00:58:27,037 -Miles? -Yeah, miles, about 200 miles. 539 00:58:27,116 --> 00:58:31,036 -Two hundred miles. -Two hundred miles. Yeah, man. 540 00:58:31,516 --> 00:58:32,916 You know, l wonder if l could paddle 541 00:58:32,997 --> 00:58:35,037 all the way down that into the Gulf of California. 542 00:58:35,117 --> 00:58:37,837 Yeah, yeah, yeah, you can. You know, l will go with you. 543 00:58:38,317 --> 00:58:40,717 l will go with you. We leave Sonja here, and then we take the kayak. 544 00:58:40,797 --> 00:58:42,957 No, no. We go all the way down into Mexico. 545 00:58:43,036 --> 00:58:47,596 You know, because in every man's heart, there is a Mexican mistress. 546 00:59:03,636 --> 00:59:05,316 Oh, man. 547 00:59:05,796 --> 00:59:07,996 l've gotta go, you guys. l'm really sorry. l gotta go. 548 00:59:08,077 --> 00:59:09,877 -What's going on? -Why? 549 00:59:09,957 --> 00:59:13,437 The river patrol's after me. l'm actually not supposed to be here, you know. 550 00:59:13,517 --> 00:59:15,037 You have to have, like, a permit, 551 00:59:15,116 --> 00:59:18,636 it's like a government thing to be here, and l didn't get one. 552 00:59:18,716 --> 00:59:20,516 lf you see anybody, any of the rangers or anything, 553 00:59:20,596 --> 00:59:22,396 just tell them you didn't see me, okay? 554 00:59:22,477 --> 00:59:23,517 Okay. 555 00:59:23,597 --> 00:59:27,957 Okay, again, l'm really, really sorry, man. l wish l could stay, you know. 556 00:59:28,036 --> 00:59:28,996 Take care, man. 557 00:59:29,077 --> 00:59:30,077 -All right. Take care, Mads. -Nice to meet you. 558 00:59:30,157 --> 00:59:32,957 -Bye, Alex. -l wish... l wish l could stay. 559 00:59:33,037 --> 00:59:35,277 Say hello to Mexico from me. 560 00:59:37,597 --> 00:59:39,677 Bye, Alex! 561 01:00:10,637 --> 01:00:13,437 lt would be Christmas in a couple of months, 562 01:00:13,797 --> 01:00:17,237 and the last news we'd had was about his car being found. 563 01:00:17,757 --> 01:00:21,957 l woke up a couple of days ago, and for the first time, it bothered me 564 01:00:22,157 --> 01:00:25,437 that it wasn't only my parents who hadn't heard from Chris. 565 01:00:25,516 --> 01:00:26,596 Honey? 566 01:00:26,677 --> 01:00:31,037 lt's me. l'm sorry. Everything that happened, it's my fault. 567 01:00:32,557 --> 01:00:34,397 Give me another chance. 568 01:00:36,076 --> 01:00:39,436 Please do that... Come on. Do that for me. 569 01:00:42,437 --> 01:00:44,637 Come on. They're calling for another quarter right now, 570 01:00:44,716 --> 01:00:47,236 and l ain't got it, so will you hurry it up? 571 01:00:48,516 --> 01:00:50,516 Come on now, don't hang up on me. 572 01:00:51,396 --> 01:00:54,236 Hey, here's a quarter. 573 01:00:54,316 --> 01:00:55,596 Thank you. 574 01:00:55,837 --> 01:00:59,477 There's a quarter just happened out of the sky, 575 01:00:59,557 --> 01:01:02,797 so l'm on here talking to you again. 576 01:01:03,957 --> 01:01:07,317 l got the quarter now, let's... No, no, no, no, no! 577 01:01:11,956 --> 01:01:15,636 l wondered why he hadn't tried to call in case l might answer. 578 01:01:15,917 --> 01:01:18,357 He could've hung up if it wasn't me. 579 01:01:19,477 --> 01:01:22,957 Why wouldn't he send a letter, maybe through a friend? 580 01:01:23,037 --> 01:01:24,597 lt hurt a little, 581 01:01:26,916 --> 01:01:29,436 but l told myself it was good. 582 01:01:31,436 --> 01:01:35,116 He knew l loved him enough to bear with the not knowing. 583 01:01:37,157 --> 01:01:41,317 And it helped me remember that there was something more than rebellion, 584 01:01:41,596 --> 01:01:44,076 more than anger that was driving him. 585 01:01:50,317 --> 01:01:53,957 Chris had always been driven, had always been an adventurer. 586 01:02:07,597 --> 01:02:09,357 When he was four years old, 587 01:02:09,436 --> 01:02:14,276 he once wandered six blocks away from home at 3:00 in the morning. 588 01:02:20,716 --> 01:02:22,916 He was found in a neighbor's kitchen 589 01:02:22,996 --> 01:02:26,116 up on a chair, digging through their candy drawer. 590 01:02:28,477 --> 01:02:33,157 Whatever drawer he was opening now must have something pretty sweet in it. 591 01:04:26,596 --> 01:04:30,356 -You lived in a cave for 36 days? -Yes, sir. 592 01:04:30,476 --> 01:04:32,396 And how did you get into Mexico in the first place? 593 01:04:32,476 --> 01:04:34,956 Through the spillway at Morelos Dam. 594 01:04:35,396 --> 01:04:37,316 River dries out pretty quickly beyond there, doesn't it? 595 01:04:37,396 --> 01:04:41,996 Yeah. Turns into a maze of irrigation canals, thanks to our dams up north. 596 01:04:42,396 --> 01:04:46,156 So l ported my kayak over the desert, and l hitched down to Golfo. 597 01:04:47,276 --> 01:04:51,276 But after a few weeks, a sandstorm came up and blew the kayak away. 598 01:04:51,596 --> 01:04:53,836 So l walked back north. Here l am. 599 01:04:53,916 --> 01:04:57,476 Well, you just can't be crossing the borders without any identification. 600 01:04:57,556 --> 01:04:59,356 -Are we understood? -Yes, sir. 601 01:04:59,437 --> 01:05:01,797 l've eaten enough sand to send me back to the city anyway. 602 01:05:01,876 --> 01:05:04,476 All right. Sit tight. l'll be right back. 603 01:05:05,836 --> 01:05:09,716 Some may ask, "Why act now? Why not wait?" 604 01:05:10,476 --> 01:05:14,076 The answer is clear. The world could wait no longer. 605 01:07:34,316 --> 01:07:35,956 Hi. Do you have the time? 606 01:07:36,396 --> 01:07:37,796 -Time? -Time? 607 01:07:37,876 --> 01:07:39,076 Yeah. 608 01:07:40,316 --> 01:07:41,676 Okay. 609 01:08:20,916 --> 01:08:22,236 Front and back. 610 01:08:22,316 --> 01:08:26,156 l don't have any more clipboards, so get one from the other fellas. 611 01:08:26,396 --> 01:08:27,836 -Next. -Hi. 612 01:08:28,076 --> 01:08:30,356 Can you tell me how to get an lD? 613 01:08:30,516 --> 01:08:33,146 -Did you lose your identification, sir? -Yeah. 614 01:08:33,236 --> 01:08:35,716 No birth certificate? Nothing? 615 01:08:35,956 --> 01:08:37,036 Ouch. 616 01:08:37,316 --> 01:08:40,916 All right. Well, you're gonna have to work that out with the DMV. 617 01:08:40,996 --> 01:08:45,116 You can catch them in the morning. The closest one is Montebello, 618 01:08:46,076 --> 01:08:47,996 and we can help you with the bus voucher. 619 01:08:48,076 --> 01:08:50,076 So just come to this desk when you're ready for the voucher. 620 01:08:50,156 --> 01:08:51,716 -Okay. -What's your name? 621 01:08:51,796 --> 01:08:55,316 -Alexander Supertramp. -What's that? 622 01:08:55,396 --> 01:09:01,036 -Alexander Supertramp. -Supertramp. Really? 623 01:09:01,276 --> 01:09:02,236 Yeah. 624 01:09:03,316 --> 01:09:06,916 Okay, so l'm gonna look for you, Supertramp. l got something for you. 625 01:09:09,316 --> 01:09:11,636 -Here you go, Supertramp. -Thank you very much. 626 01:09:11,716 --> 01:09:12,956 Okay, baby. 627 01:09:13,036 --> 01:09:15,946 -And one last thing. -Yeah. 628 01:09:17,796 --> 01:09:20,116 Do you have a bed for me? l'm sorry... 629 01:09:20,196 --> 01:09:23,836 Oh, no. Sure, l got a bed for you. Sign your name right here. 630 01:09:23,916 --> 01:09:28,916 You fill this out. And l'll set you right up. Now, l'm out of... 631 01:09:28,996 --> 01:09:31,716 -What's going on back there? -l got it. l'm sorry. 632 01:09:31,796 --> 01:09:35,036 -Come on, now. Work with me. -All right. Thanks, ma'am. 633 01:09:35,116 --> 01:09:37,346 Supertramp, huh? 634 01:09:40,156 --> 01:09:41,986 You know the drill. 635 01:10:13,876 --> 01:10:15,356 Move it! 636 01:11:00,996 --> 01:11:03,516 Thanks, but l'm not gonna need that bed after all. 637 01:11:03,595 --> 01:11:05,705 You leaving us so soon? Supertramp! 638 01:12:06,796 --> 01:12:10,946 Show me your face. l never, ever, ever forget a face. 639 01:12:11,356 --> 01:12:14,236 lf l see yours again, l won't arrest you, l'll kill you. 640 01:12:14,316 --> 01:12:16,116 This is the goddamned railroad, 641 01:12:16,196 --> 01:12:17,756 and we will do whatever we have to do 642 01:12:17,836 --> 01:12:20,156 to keep you freeloaders from violating our liability. 643 01:12:20,236 --> 01:12:21,476 Yes, sir. 644 01:12:25,036 --> 01:12:26,636 You got any lD? 645 01:12:27,916 --> 01:12:30,996 -No, sir. -Of course you don't. 646 01:12:31,836 --> 01:12:33,556 Last time, my friend. 647 01:12:34,636 --> 01:12:35,906 All clear. 648 01:12:43,596 --> 01:12:44,916 Good boy! 649 01:13:02,235 --> 01:13:05,195 Yeah! That's what l'm talking about. Finally! 650 01:13:08,275 --> 01:13:11,305 lt's a mystery to me 651 01:13:12,115 --> 01:13:17,275 We have a greed With which we have agreed 652 01:13:18,636 --> 01:13:23,276 You think you have to want more than you need 653 01:13:24,435 --> 01:13:28,955 Until you have it all you won't be freed 654 01:13:31,756 --> 01:13:36,956 Society, you're a crazy breed 655 01:13:37,475 --> 01:13:43,195 l hope you're not lonely without me 656 01:13:46,476 --> 01:13:51,306 When you want more than you have You think you need 657 01:13:52,196 --> 01:13:56,876 And when you think more than you want Your thoughts begin to bleed 658 01:13:58,356 --> 01:14:03,116 l think l need to find a bigger place 659 01:14:03,596 --> 01:14:05,876 'Cause when you have more than you think 660 01:14:05,956 --> 01:14:08,076 You need more space 661 01:14:11,516 --> 01:14:16,716 Society, you're a crazy breed 662 01:14:17,196 --> 01:14:21,956 l hope you're not lonely without me 663 01:14:22,836 --> 01:14:27,666 Society, crazy indeed 664 01:14:28,556 --> 01:14:34,636 l hope you're not lonely without me 665 01:15:21,995 --> 01:15:23,385 Thanks a lot. 666 01:15:32,236 --> 01:15:35,076 ln the letters Chris wrote me from college, 667 01:15:35,596 --> 01:15:39,636 it was clear his anguish and problems with Mom and Dad had continued. 668 01:15:48,715 --> 01:15:50,505 He said l was the only person in the world 669 01:15:50,596 --> 01:15:53,106 who could possibly understand what he had to say. 670 01:15:53,196 --> 01:15:56,076 With whose money are you buying all these goddamn presents? 671 01:15:56,155 --> 01:15:58,465 l work. The only reason l'm not talking is because 672 01:15:58,556 --> 01:16:01,116 you're wandering around acting like the big-shot flirt with everybody. 673 01:16:01,195 --> 01:16:04,625 l am making the contacts for this business to work! 674 01:16:04,755 --> 01:16:06,635 You don't care at all about what l do! 675 01:16:06,715 --> 01:16:08,465 l don't even want to talk to you about it anymore! 676 01:16:08,556 --> 01:16:11,516 Don't you walk away from me, woman! Woman! 677 01:16:12,116 --> 01:16:14,396 Kids! Look what your dad is doing to me! 678 01:16:14,556 --> 01:16:17,756 For God's sake, look what your mother is making me do! 679 01:16:17,836 --> 01:16:19,756 Fuck you! l hate you! 680 01:16:22,035 --> 01:16:25,065 There ain't gonna be no party. l'm gonna cancel Christmas this year. 681 01:16:25,195 --> 01:16:28,315 Cancel Christmas? Who do you think you are? God? 682 01:16:28,395 --> 01:16:30,145 That's right! l'm God! 683 01:16:30,236 --> 01:16:32,956 Well, you're not God. You can't cancel Christmas. 684 01:16:33,195 --> 01:16:34,465 That's bullshit! 685 01:18:25,836 --> 01:18:27,276 We're 1 0 deep! 686 01:18:34,835 --> 01:18:39,435 Alex, l don't mean to be on you about everything. You're doing a great job. 687 01:18:39,635 --> 01:18:43,185 l wanna keep you on and we all wanna help you get to Alaska, 688 01:18:43,836 --> 01:18:46,346 but you've got to start wearing socks. 689 01:18:53,956 --> 01:18:57,516 With almost a year having passed since Chris' disappearance, 690 01:18:58,035 --> 01:19:01,265 my parents' anger, their desperation, 691 01:19:01,356 --> 01:19:03,586 their guilt was giving way to pain. 692 01:19:06,475 --> 01:19:08,985 And pain seemed to bring them closer. 693 01:19:11,236 --> 01:19:13,356 Even their faces had changed. 694 01:19:38,475 --> 01:19:40,825 She convinces herseIf it's Chris, 695 01:19:42,155 --> 01:19:45,345 that it's her son whenever she passes a stray. 696 01:19:47,075 --> 01:19:49,355 And l fear for the mother in her. 697 01:19:52,875 --> 01:19:57,665 lnstincts that seem to sense the threat of a loss so huge 698 01:19:57,756 --> 01:20:02,276 and irrevocable that the mind balks at taking its measure. 699 01:20:04,395 --> 01:20:08,785 l'd begin to wonder if l can understand all that Chris is saying any longer, 700 01:20:11,836 --> 01:20:14,676 but l catch myself and remember that 701 01:20:14,756 --> 01:20:17,036 these are not the parents he grew up with, 702 01:20:18,275 --> 01:20:22,705 but people softened by the forced reflection that comes with loss. 703 01:20:27,115 --> 01:20:31,995 Still, everything Chris is saying has to be said. 704 01:20:33,676 --> 01:20:37,386 And l trust for him that everything he is doing has to be done. 705 01:20:39,115 --> 01:20:40,665 This is our life. 706 01:21:45,595 --> 01:21:49,065 Big game. Very big game. 707 01:21:49,516 --> 01:21:50,626 Got it. 708 01:23:37,036 --> 01:23:38,356 Damn it! 709 01:23:42,515 --> 01:23:43,785 Get off! 710 01:24:24,955 --> 01:24:28,225 "Hey, Dad, can l light the barbeque, please, Dad, this time?" 711 01:24:28,835 --> 01:24:30,225 "Well, Son, you can go get the lighter fluid." 712 01:24:30,315 --> 01:24:32,715 "Come on, Dad. Please, Dad, please?" 713 01:24:33,355 --> 01:24:35,825 "Well, why not, Walt? That sounds like a good idea..." 714 01:24:35,915 --> 01:24:37,745 "Shut up, Carine! Shut up, Carine! 715 01:24:37,835 --> 01:24:42,155 "No, Billie. l told you once. Don't make me tell you again. Okay? 716 01:24:42,475 --> 01:24:44,075 "Okay? 717 01:24:44,315 --> 01:24:45,905 "You hear me? You hear me, woman? 718 01:24:45,995 --> 01:24:48,865 "You hear me, woman? Huh? You hear me, woman?" 719 01:24:51,115 --> 01:24:56,315 "Sorry. Sorry, Walt. l'm sorry." 720 01:25:08,995 --> 01:25:10,145 Shit. 721 01:25:15,955 --> 01:25:20,505 No! No! Damn it! 722 01:25:23,275 --> 01:25:25,825 God damn it! Fuck! 723 01:26:07,435 --> 01:26:12,305 "There was clearly felt the presence of a force not bound to be kind to man. 724 01:26:13,515 --> 01:26:16,905 "lt was a place of heathenism and superstitious rites, 725 01:26:18,195 --> 01:26:21,475 "to be inhabited by men nearer of kin to the rocks 726 01:26:21,675 --> 01:26:24,105 "and to the wild animals than we." 727 01:26:45,835 --> 01:26:47,025 Sunni. 728 01:26:47,515 --> 01:26:50,425 Hey, Sunni! Come here, baby. 729 01:26:55,755 --> 01:26:58,265 No. No! 730 01:27:30,515 --> 01:27:33,705 But now all l'm focused on is just Alaska. 731 01:27:33,795 --> 01:27:35,305 -Yeah. -Alaska. 732 01:27:37,195 --> 01:27:40,065 All right. Let's hear it for lnsane Cain! 733 01:27:43,395 --> 01:27:46,385 Let's give it up for Slab City's own Tracy T! 734 01:27:54,755 --> 01:27:56,585 Hey. My name's Tracy. 735 01:27:56,675 --> 01:27:58,395 -Tracy! -Yeah! 736 01:28:27,235 --> 01:28:29,745 Jack London is king. 737 01:28:30,835 --> 01:28:32,865 Hey, you gonna stay with us long? 738 01:28:33,635 --> 01:28:35,705 Well, l'm waiting on a check from my last job 739 01:28:35,795 --> 01:28:38,075 to come into Salton City the day after Christmas. 740 01:28:38,155 --> 01:28:40,825 l've got to start thinking about getting ready for Alaska. 741 01:28:40,915 --> 01:28:45,305 When the sun gets a little lower tonight, l'm going to start a calisthenics routine. 742 01:28:45,634 --> 01:28:48,274 After the check comes in, l think l'm gonna try to find 743 01:28:48,355 --> 01:28:51,505 some big old mountains l can climb every day until spring comes. 744 01:28:51,595 --> 01:28:53,665 l've got to see how far the money's gonna go. 745 01:28:53,755 --> 01:28:57,185 l've still got a lot of supplies to pick up before spring. 746 01:28:57,995 --> 01:29:02,345 So, l might get anotherjob or l might be okay. 747 01:29:02,875 --> 01:29:06,865 Hell, we'd give you a little something for the days you spend in the booth here. 748 01:29:06,955 --> 01:29:09,345 l'm not taking any money from you, Rainey. 749 01:29:09,795 --> 01:29:12,585 lt's been a real great twist meeting you two. 750 01:29:12,675 --> 01:29:14,785 You two look like you're doing good. 751 01:29:15,075 --> 01:29:16,945 -We are doing good. -Yeah? 752 01:29:17,034 --> 01:29:18,194 We're doing real good. 753 01:29:18,875 --> 01:29:21,745 Speaking of which, don't you think 754 01:29:21,834 --> 01:29:25,994 you ought to introduce yourself to our little Joni Mitchell over there? 755 01:29:30,235 --> 01:29:31,185 l... 756 01:30:04,555 --> 01:30:07,025 -Hi. -Hi. 757 01:30:12,434 --> 01:30:14,314 You selling these books? 758 01:30:14,595 --> 01:30:17,305 l am. We are. 759 01:30:18,515 --> 01:30:19,785 He was. 760 01:30:23,395 --> 01:30:24,865 l like to read. 761 01:30:25,675 --> 01:30:28,065 -Do you? -Yeah. 762 01:30:28,715 --> 01:30:30,465 That's good. 763 01:30:31,595 --> 01:30:35,145 l heard you play your song last night. 764 01:30:36,314 --> 01:30:40,874 -l'm terrible. -You are not terrible. You sing sweet. 765 01:30:41,674 --> 01:30:42,954 Thank you. 766 01:30:46,194 --> 01:30:49,234 l was gonna go take a walk to Salvation Mountain. 767 01:30:49,874 --> 01:30:52,554 -You wanna go? -Okay. 768 01:31:00,235 --> 01:31:02,785 -Hi. -Hi. Alex. 769 01:31:03,715 --> 01:31:09,225 l'd like to show you around up here. l've been here since 1 984, more or less. 770 01:31:11,915 --> 01:31:13,585 A lot of tourists come in here 771 01:31:13,675 --> 01:31:17,305 and they look at that car door up there. They really like it. 772 01:31:18,154 --> 01:31:21,994 And l found car doors and put them up there and l bolted it all in. 773 01:31:22,075 --> 01:31:23,505 Where did you get the telephone poles? 774 01:31:23,595 --> 01:31:26,305 A lot of people in the valley just love me a lot. 775 01:31:26,435 --> 01:31:28,865 Everybody now, l think, in the whole world is just loving me. 776 01:31:28,955 --> 01:31:32,065 And l want to have the wisdom to love them back. 777 01:31:33,035 --> 01:31:35,545 And that's about it. So l really get excited. 778 01:31:35,635 --> 01:31:37,265 You really believe in love, then. 779 01:31:37,354 --> 01:31:39,594 Yeah. Totally. 780 01:31:40,234 --> 01:31:44,954 This is a love story that is staggering to everybody in the whole world. 781 01:31:45,034 --> 01:31:47,754 That God really loves us a lot. 782 01:31:48,755 --> 01:31:50,195 Does that answer that? 783 01:31:50,275 --> 01:31:51,825 -Yeah. -Good. 784 01:31:53,715 --> 01:31:57,785 l really love it here. l think the freedom of this place is just so beautiful. 785 01:31:57,875 --> 01:32:01,665 To me, l wouldn't move for $1 0 million, unless l had to. 786 01:32:03,394 --> 01:32:06,954 So l'm contented here in the desert, and l'm living where l want to live. 787 01:32:07,155 --> 01:32:12,465 And l think good gets better. And l think those great big tanks there 788 01:32:12,555 --> 01:32:16,025 were the sewer plant for the Marine base in World War ll. 789 01:32:18,515 --> 01:32:21,105 lf you want to, you can try putting your hands in there. 790 01:32:21,195 --> 01:32:24,225 And l'm gonna do the same thing, just for the fun. 791 01:32:24,875 --> 01:32:26,705 You're doing real good. 792 01:32:29,994 --> 01:32:33,194 You can wipe your hands off on my shirt if you want. 793 01:32:52,715 --> 01:32:55,105 This is starting to make me hungry. 794 01:32:55,875 --> 01:32:59,745 l was just a couple of years older than Tracy when l got pregnant. 795 01:33:03,435 --> 01:33:04,985 -Wow. -Yeah. 796 01:33:06,715 --> 01:33:10,665 Yeah, l thought my husband and l were going to just make peace on Earth 797 01:33:11,434 --> 01:33:14,114 and babies and love and stay together forever, 798 01:33:16,555 --> 01:33:19,265 and that didn't quite work out that way. 799 01:33:19,355 --> 01:33:21,825 He left me. 800 01:33:25,834 --> 01:33:27,474 So, l... 801 01:33:29,355 --> 01:33:30,345 Anyway, whatever, 802 01:33:30,435 --> 01:33:35,265 but l ended up raising Reno on my own. That's my boy, his name's Reno. 803 01:33:36,835 --> 01:33:38,465 Then l met Rainey. 804 01:33:39,595 --> 01:33:42,505 That was sweet. lt was really good for a while. lt's just... 805 01:33:47,354 --> 01:33:51,794 You know, Reno was a teenager already by then, 806 01:33:51,914 --> 01:33:54,954 and he was just on his way to becoming his own man. 807 01:33:59,395 --> 01:34:04,665 And l haven't even heard from him in two years. 808 01:34:08,234 --> 01:34:10,394 l don't even know where he is. 809 01:34:10,915 --> 01:34:13,225 l hope l get to meet him sometime. 810 01:34:15,555 --> 01:34:17,825 Do your folks know where you are? 811 01:34:22,555 --> 01:34:25,505 Hey, guys? Dinner's ready if you guys are hungry. 812 01:34:25,595 --> 01:34:29,185 Yeah, we are. We're hungry. 813 01:34:32,594 --> 01:34:34,154 l'll be all right. 814 01:34:44,554 --> 01:34:46,194 You want to come and eat? 815 01:34:46,754 --> 01:34:50,034 Or we'll sit here. Because l will sit here with you all night. 816 01:34:55,075 --> 01:34:56,545 Let's go. Let's go. 817 01:34:59,074 --> 01:35:01,074 Guys, come on. lt's getting cold. 818 01:35:04,554 --> 01:35:09,514 Check this out. Tawdry? Denise, that sounds like your cup of tea. 819 01:35:38,074 --> 01:35:41,914 That poor girl is about ready to vault herself onto a fence post. 820 01:35:42,714 --> 01:35:46,874 And here you are, the monk of Jack fucking LaLanne. 821 01:35:53,475 --> 01:35:57,345 -So Jan talked to you about Reno, huh? -Yeah. 822 01:36:00,234 --> 01:36:03,794 Children can be pretty harsh when it comes to their parents. 823 01:36:04,315 --> 01:36:06,425 You planning on seeing yours? 824 01:36:08,594 --> 01:36:10,834 l've only got one plan, Rainey. 825 01:36:11,875 --> 01:36:14,425 That would be Alaska? 826 01:36:14,634 --> 01:36:15,994 Alaska. 827 01:36:27,034 --> 01:36:28,154 Hello? 828 01:36:29,754 --> 01:36:32,674 -Merry Christmas. -Come in here. 829 01:36:41,434 --> 01:36:43,434 My parents went into town. 830 01:36:45,035 --> 01:36:45,985 No. 831 01:36:46,314 --> 01:36:49,354 Yeah. They went to call my grandma for Christmas. 832 01:36:49,995 --> 01:36:52,065 No, l mean we can't do that. 833 01:36:53,234 --> 01:36:54,434 Why not? 834 01:37:01,355 --> 01:37:02,865 How old are you? 835 01:37:03,754 --> 01:37:04,994 Eighteen. 836 01:37:07,955 --> 01:37:09,385 Seventeen. 837 01:37:11,154 --> 01:37:13,034 What year were you born? 838 01:37:19,595 --> 01:37:21,185 So l'm 1 6. 839 01:37:34,715 --> 01:37:37,025 You want to do something together? 840 01:38:47,994 --> 01:38:52,474 You can send mail to this address in South Dakota. 841 01:38:54,034 --> 01:38:58,234 l don't know when l'm going to get it, but l'll get it. 842 01:39:02,354 --> 01:39:04,074 You're pretty magic. 843 01:39:04,154 --> 01:39:06,714 -Yeah? -Yeah. 844 01:39:08,554 --> 01:39:10,154 And just remember 845 01:39:10,514 --> 01:39:14,834 if you want something in life, reach out and grab it. 846 01:39:35,274 --> 01:39:37,234 -You take care, kiddo. -You, too. 847 01:39:39,434 --> 01:39:42,394 -New Year's resolution? -We'll work on it. 848 01:40:47,434 --> 01:40:50,154 Just get your pack and get on out of here, okay? 849 01:40:51,235 --> 01:40:53,505 l don't think l could take a hug. 850 01:41:07,594 --> 01:41:08,554 Hey. 851 01:41:20,634 --> 01:41:21,674 Bye! 852 01:41:35,914 --> 01:41:40,314 A year and a half had passed in what Dad called "suspended animation." 853 01:41:47,474 --> 01:41:53,194 The weight of Chris' disappearance had begun to lay down on me full-length. 854 01:42:04,114 --> 01:42:06,274 "l have lived through much, 855 01:42:07,274 --> 01:42:10,874 "and now l think l have found what is needed for happiness. 856 01:42:14,514 --> 01:42:17,154 "A quiet secluded life in the country, 857 01:42:18,954 --> 01:42:23,514 "with the possibility of being useful to people to whom it is easy to do good, 858 01:42:25,194 --> 01:42:28,554 "and who are not accustomed to have it done to them. 859 01:42:30,314 --> 01:42:33,314 "And work which one hopes may be of some use. 860 01:42:34,874 --> 01:42:39,034 "Then rest, nature, books, music, 861 01:42:39,714 --> 01:42:41,674 "love for one's neighbor. 862 01:42:45,434 --> 01:42:47,794 "Such is my idea of happiness. 863 01:42:50,594 --> 01:42:56,914 "And then, on top of all that, you for a mate, 864 01:42:58,034 --> 01:42:59,914 "and children perhaps. 865 01:43:01,714 --> 01:43:04,434 "What more can the heart of a man desire?" 866 01:43:12,394 --> 01:43:16,634 Comes the morning when l can feel 867 01:43:16,714 --> 01:43:20,914 That there's nothing left to be concealed 868 01:43:20,994 --> 01:43:25,274 Moving on A scene surreal 869 01:43:25,354 --> 01:43:31,194 But my heart will never Never be far from here 870 01:43:31,274 --> 01:43:35,394 Sure as l'm breathing Sure as l'm sad 871 01:43:35,474 --> 01:43:39,794 l'll keep this wisdom in my flesh 872 01:43:39,874 --> 01:43:44,314 l leave here believing More than l had 873 01:43:44,394 --> 01:43:47,914 And there's a reason l will 874 01:43:47,994 --> 01:43:52,034 A reason l'll be back 875 01:43:55,474 --> 01:43:59,674 As l walk the hemisphere 876 01:43:59,754 --> 01:44:03,954 l got my wish to up and disappear 877 01:44:04,034 --> 01:44:08,194 l've been wounded l've been healed 878 01:44:08,274 --> 01:44:11,274 Now for landing l've been 879 01:44:11,354 --> 01:44:14,154 Landing l've been cleared 880 01:44:14,234 --> 01:44:18,594 Sure as l'm breathing Sure as l'm sad 881 01:44:18,674 --> 01:44:22,874 l'll keep this wisdom in my flesh 882 01:44:22,954 --> 01:44:27,194 l leave here believing More than l had 883 01:44:27,274 --> 01:44:31,154 This love has got no ceiling 884 01:47:31,153 --> 01:47:32,753 Where's your camp? 885 01:47:33,513 --> 01:47:35,953 Just out past Oh-My-God Hot Springs. 886 01:47:36,714 --> 01:47:39,714 l've lived in and around here for six years now 887 01:47:40,233 --> 01:47:42,233 and l've never heard of any place that goes by that name. 888 01:47:42,314 --> 01:47:45,154 -Show me how to get there. -Yeah. 889 01:47:48,634 --> 01:47:51,154 -Ron Franz. -Alex. 890 01:47:51,274 --> 01:47:53,034 Alex? Where you from, Alex? 891 01:47:53,914 --> 01:47:57,754 -West Virginia. -Okay, Alex from West Virginia. 892 01:48:40,954 --> 01:48:45,514 Well, this is something out here. 893 01:48:50,194 --> 01:48:51,394 Don't you... 894 01:48:52,353 --> 01:48:56,873 Don't you worry about those dope smokers and nudists down below there? 895 01:48:56,954 --> 01:49:00,634 No, they keep to themselves pretty much. 896 01:49:00,713 --> 01:49:03,873 You strike me as a bright young man. Am l wrong about that? 897 01:49:05,034 --> 01:49:07,354 l think l've got my head on my shoulders pretty good. 898 01:49:07,433 --> 01:49:09,113 Well, that's what l mean. 899 01:49:13,594 --> 01:49:15,594 How long you been out here? 900 01:49:17,154 --> 01:49:20,234 -Couple of weeks. -And before that? 901 01:49:20,714 --> 01:49:23,754 A lot of places. Been moving around a lot. 902 01:49:24,834 --> 01:49:27,914 -Well, how old are you? -Twenty-three. 903 01:49:28,794 --> 01:49:29,994 Twenty-three years old! 904 01:49:30,073 --> 01:49:32,953 Son, don't you think you ought to be getting an education? 905 01:49:33,034 --> 01:49:35,914 And a job? And making something of this life? 906 01:49:38,993 --> 01:49:40,553 Look, Mr. Franz, 907 01:49:41,674 --> 01:49:45,394 l think careers are a 20th century invention, and l don't want one. 908 01:49:46,314 --> 01:49:49,994 You don't need to worry about me. l have a college education. 909 01:49:50,233 --> 01:49:54,233 l'm not destitute. l'm living like this by choice. 910 01:49:55,834 --> 01:50:00,034 -ln the dirt? -Yeah, in the dirt. 911 01:50:04,154 --> 01:50:07,714 -Where's your family? -Don't have one anymore. 912 01:50:10,953 --> 01:50:12,393 That's a shame. 913 01:50:15,593 --> 01:50:18,193 Hey, Mr. Franz, l want to show you something. 914 01:50:18,913 --> 01:50:23,793 Come on. 915 01:50:48,393 --> 01:50:53,553 lt's getting a little steep. A little high for me, kid. 916 01:50:54,953 --> 01:50:56,433 All right, 917 01:50:57,674 --> 01:51:00,834 but even from halfway out, it's quite a sight, isn't it? 918 01:51:02,793 --> 01:51:07,433 From the top, you can see all the way to the Salton Sea, too. 919 01:51:08,074 --> 01:51:10,394 You can see the Salton Sea from up there? 920 01:51:10,674 --> 01:51:11,914 Yes, sir. 921 01:51:12,673 --> 01:51:13,993 My goodness. 922 01:51:15,033 --> 01:51:19,673 -You don't want to go up? -Nope. l don't do these kind of things. 923 01:51:23,113 --> 01:51:25,433 l spent most of my life in the Army. 924 01:51:28,153 --> 01:51:32,713 New Year's Eve, 1 957, l was stationed in Okinawa. 925 01:51:34,154 --> 01:51:37,994 My wife and son were here in the States just driving down the road, 926 01:51:38,073 --> 01:51:41,473 and some fella who'd had too much to drink plowed right into them. 927 01:51:41,993 --> 01:51:43,913 Killed them both. 928 01:51:48,114 --> 01:51:53,034 Now you might think the last thing l would do in the world 929 01:51:55,753 --> 01:51:57,473 is go to the whiskey. 930 01:51:59,114 --> 01:52:03,154 But at the time, it felt like the only thing l could do. 931 01:52:03,234 --> 01:52:05,754 And l did it hard! 932 01:52:08,633 --> 01:52:11,033 But pretty soon l realized 933 01:52:11,753 --> 01:52:15,833 l wasn't doing my wife and son any good mourning them with the bottle. 934 01:52:16,193 --> 01:52:20,073 So l pulled myself together and l quit drinking, 935 01:52:20,713 --> 01:52:22,033 cold turkey. 936 01:52:23,273 --> 01:52:27,473 So since all that, this is pretty much me. 937 01:52:28,714 --> 01:52:30,874 Do you ever travel, Mr. Franz? 938 01:52:31,874 --> 01:52:34,834 No, l can't seem to get too far from my leather. 939 01:52:36,473 --> 01:52:40,873 l do a lot of leather engraving. l got a little workshop out in the garage. 940 01:52:41,194 --> 01:52:43,314 Between that and my pension, l do pretty well. 941 01:52:43,394 --> 01:52:45,834 But every time l think l might take a trip somewhere, 942 01:52:45,913 --> 01:52:49,393 l get too far behind on orders and such to consider it. 943 01:52:50,234 --> 01:52:52,794 When we finish eating, l'd love to see your workshop. 944 01:52:52,874 --> 01:52:54,234 -Would you? -Oh, yeah. 945 01:52:54,313 --> 01:52:56,033 l was hoping you'd say that. 946 01:52:56,113 --> 01:52:58,953 -lt's amazing how malleable this is. -Yeah, it is. 947 01:52:59,034 --> 01:53:00,674 When the leather is wet you can really... 948 01:53:00,753 --> 01:53:02,033 -lt's like butter. -Yeah. 949 01:53:02,113 --> 01:53:05,513 lt's amazing. And then it hardens up, and, l mean, it stays right there. 950 01:53:48,713 --> 01:53:54,153 A good whack with the mallet. Crack it down. Whack. Bang. 951 01:54:52,034 --> 01:54:55,554 l went to South Dakota. l worked at a grain elevator 952 01:54:55,633 --> 01:54:58,073 for this guy named Wayne. He was a really good guy. 953 01:54:58,153 --> 01:54:59,673 So l took the Colorado River 954 01:54:59,753 --> 01:55:02,913 all the way down through the Grand Canyon and did rapids, 955 01:55:02,993 --> 01:55:06,473 which is by far one of the scariest things l've ever done. 956 01:55:06,594 --> 01:55:11,754 And l took the Colorado down into Mexico, Golfo, where l got stuck. 957 01:55:12,593 --> 01:55:14,833 Salvation Mountain. The Slabs. 958 01:55:16,474 --> 01:55:18,514 What's the "N" stand for? 959 01:55:20,073 --> 01:55:21,193 North. 960 01:55:22,433 --> 01:55:24,033 Alaska? 961 01:55:26,913 --> 01:55:29,313 Son, what the hell are you running from? 962 01:55:30,393 --> 01:55:32,753 You know, l can ask you the same question! 963 01:55:33,754 --> 01:55:36,074 Except l already know the answer! 964 01:55:36,873 --> 01:55:38,313 You do, do you? 965 01:55:39,033 --> 01:55:43,113 l do, Mr. Franz! You got to get back out in the world! 966 01:55:43,873 --> 01:55:46,953 Get out of that lonely house, that little workshop of yours. 967 01:55:47,034 --> 01:55:50,914 Get back out on the road! Really! 968 01:55:51,753 --> 01:55:54,273 You're going to live a long time, Ron! 969 01:55:54,353 --> 01:55:57,513 You should make a radical change in your lifestyle! 970 01:55:58,154 --> 01:56:01,914 l mean, the core of man's spirit comes from new experiences. 971 01:56:02,433 --> 01:56:06,473 And there you are, stubborn old man, sitting on your butt. 972 01:56:07,553 --> 01:56:10,273 -Sitting on my butt? -Yeah. 973 01:56:11,753 --> 01:56:15,993 l'll show you sitting on my butt! 974 01:56:16,073 --> 01:56:18,033 "Stubborn old man." 975 01:56:19,433 --> 01:56:21,033 l'll show you! 976 01:56:21,513 --> 01:56:23,633 Come on, then! Come on. 977 01:56:26,473 --> 01:56:29,473 Sitting on my butt? Yeah. 978 01:56:31,474 --> 01:56:33,554 Come on, old man. Come climbing. 979 01:56:33,633 --> 01:56:35,273 Sitting on my butt. 980 01:56:35,594 --> 01:56:37,034 Come on. Keep going! 981 01:56:40,713 --> 01:56:42,353 You're doing great! 982 01:56:46,953 --> 01:56:49,513 -Keep going. Keep going, Ron! -Yeah! 983 01:56:51,193 --> 01:56:54,793 Can anybody see this? God, are you watching this right now? 984 01:57:02,633 --> 01:57:03,713 Yeah. 985 01:57:06,633 --> 01:57:10,793 -You all right? -You little pinhead! 986 01:57:27,593 --> 01:57:29,833 l'm gonna miss you when you go. 987 01:57:31,393 --> 01:57:34,913 l'll miss you, too, Ron. But you're wrong if you think 988 01:57:34,993 --> 01:57:38,793 that the joy of life comes principally from human relationships. 989 01:57:39,753 --> 01:57:41,993 God's placed it all around us. lt's in everything. 990 01:57:42,073 --> 01:57:44,353 lt's in anything we can experience. 991 01:57:45,193 --> 01:57:48,553 People just need to change the way they look at those things. 992 01:57:48,633 --> 01:57:50,753 Yeah, l'm gonna take stock of that. 993 01:57:52,553 --> 01:57:53,793 No, l am. 994 01:57:57,833 --> 01:57:58,873 l am. 995 01:58:01,153 --> 01:58:03,273 But l wanted to tell you something. 996 01:58:06,873 --> 01:58:09,513 From the bits and pieces l put together, 997 01:58:09,593 --> 01:58:13,513 you know, from what you told me about your family, your mother and your dad. 998 01:58:15,433 --> 01:58:18,633 And l know you've got your problems with the church, too. 999 01:58:20,473 --> 01:58:24,073 But there's some kind of bigger thing we can all appreciate, 1000 01:58:25,033 --> 01:58:28,113 and it sounds like you don't mind calling it God. 1001 01:58:33,953 --> 01:58:36,753 But when you forgive, 1002 01:58:38,913 --> 01:58:40,113 you love. 1003 01:58:43,713 --> 01:58:46,633 And when you love, 1004 01:58:47,433 --> 01:58:49,913 God's light shines on you. 1005 01:58:54,433 --> 01:58:57,993 -Holy shit. -l told you about that language. 1006 01:59:07,753 --> 01:59:09,193 l told you so! 1007 01:59:11,953 --> 01:59:15,353 Where are the fucking animals now? l'm hungry! 1008 01:59:15,473 --> 01:59:19,513 l'm fucking hungry! l'm fucking hungry! 1009 01:59:35,873 --> 01:59:39,473 "For a moment she rediscovered the purpose of her life. 1010 01:59:40,313 --> 01:59:43,873 "She was here on earth to grasp the meaning of its wild enchantment, 1011 01:59:43,953 --> 01:59:46,673 "and to call each thing by its right name." 1012 01:59:49,833 --> 01:59:51,433 "By its right name." 1013 01:59:52,193 --> 01:59:54,433 What is this? What is this one? 1014 01:59:57,353 --> 02:00:02,113 This is Viburnum edule. Viburnum edule. 1015 02:00:06,753 --> 02:00:09,633 Hedysarum alpinum. 1016 02:00:11,633 --> 02:00:16,153 Hedysarum alpinum is wild potato root. Wild potato root. 1017 02:00:18,313 --> 02:00:21,833 Epilobium angustifolium. Fireweed. 1018 02:03:10,032 --> 02:03:12,832 Fuck it all. Fuck it all! 1019 02:05:44,752 --> 02:05:45,752 Hi. 1020 02:05:45,832 --> 02:05:48,872 What are you doing up? lt's 3:30 in the morning. 1021 02:05:49,193 --> 02:05:52,273 l heard you get off the couch about a half hour ago. 1022 02:05:53,512 --> 02:05:57,072 Had a funny feeling you might not be here for our breakfast. 1023 02:06:01,113 --> 02:06:05,833 l'm gonna drive you 1 00 miles to someplace where you can catch a train, 1024 02:06:06,552 --> 02:06:11,072 a plane or hitch a ride and not get stuck out in this desert. 1025 02:06:12,233 --> 02:06:16,073 l'd take you all the way to Alaska if l didn't have an 8:00 mass. 1026 02:06:16,393 --> 02:06:19,673 -Ron, you don't have to do that. -l want to do it. 1027 02:06:20,513 --> 02:06:23,393 Get you started on this thing of yours. 1028 02:06:23,832 --> 02:06:25,792 -On my great... -l know. 1029 02:06:26,432 --> 02:06:28,872 On your great Alaskan adventure. 1030 02:06:29,633 --> 02:06:32,233 Here. Here's a machete. 1031 02:06:34,473 --> 02:06:39,113 Collapsible fishing pole, a few other odds and ends l stuck in there for you. 1032 02:06:42,433 --> 02:06:44,753 -Ron... -Just take it. 1033 02:06:46,072 --> 02:06:48,792 l'll get dressed and meet you in the truck. 1034 02:07:42,753 --> 02:07:44,313 Well, my friend. 1035 02:07:46,672 --> 02:07:47,712 Yep. 1036 02:07:51,912 --> 02:07:54,312 l had an idea. 1037 02:07:55,393 --> 02:07:59,873 You know, my mother was an only child 1038 02:08:00,713 --> 02:08:02,473 and so was my father, 1039 02:08:03,073 --> 02:08:07,193 and l was their only child, 1040 02:08:10,432 --> 02:08:13,032 so when l'm gone, l'm the end of the line. 1041 02:08:14,033 --> 02:08:16,073 My family will be finished. 1042 02:08:19,592 --> 02:08:24,712 What do you say you let me adopt you? 1043 02:08:28,873 --> 02:08:32,833 l can be, say, your grandfather. 1044 02:08:37,032 --> 02:08:38,592 Ron, 1045 02:08:40,113 --> 02:08:43,753 could we talk about this when l get back from Alaska? 1046 02:08:44,112 --> 02:08:45,832 Would that be okay? 1047 02:08:52,833 --> 02:08:55,913 Yeah, yeah. We can do that. Yeah. 1048 02:09:00,673 --> 02:09:01,953 All right, Ron. 1049 02:09:04,233 --> 02:09:05,513 Thank you. 1050 02:09:52,633 --> 02:09:54,753 What did his voice sound like now? 1051 02:09:55,953 --> 02:09:58,073 What would he tell about now? 1052 02:09:58,512 --> 02:10:01,512 ...nine, ten. 1053 02:10:49,112 --> 02:10:53,872 l realized that the words to my thoughts were of less and less meaning. 1054 02:10:53,953 --> 02:10:55,993 Chris was writing his story, 1055 02:10:57,393 --> 02:11:00,273 and it had to be Chris who would tell it. 1056 02:13:15,272 --> 02:13:17,632 "To call each thing by its right name. 1057 02:13:22,312 --> 02:13:23,952 "By its right name." 1058 02:14:13,032 --> 02:14:14,992 What if l were smiling 1059 02:14:17,353 --> 02:14:19,593 and running into your arms? 1060 02:14:41,272 --> 02:14:42,952 Would you see then